Renewal

BREATHE    IN

Hey Penpal! How are you? What's going on recently?

I can never apologize much to write so late but the only thing I can say is that I didn't want to lose a Penpal so kind and positive like you! Whenever I read your previous mails, I can just find your open heart, full of generosity.. pouring out positivity in this pessimistic world and trying to suck out the negativity.. Ultimately filling everything with kindness!

You're one of a kind, always remain the same:)

I know it would be my foolishness to hope for your reply, but still I'll look forward to hear from you. And it's also not a compulsion for you to write back. Take this letter as a reminder that you're doing good, continue to do that. Never stop from talking your heart out! I also know that my replies are not so prompt but I hope you'll understand my situation.

I just wish that you're happy with all that life has offered to you and you're finding the love and affection, you give to people.. coming back to you at all the steps of your Life:)

May you always remain happy and surrounded with happy people!

BREATH    OUT

Thank you. Sometimes timing is everything. Sometimes we make it more than it is. Especially when life feels empty and lost and futile. I reach those moments of almost hopeless sometimes and last week I found myself there which is why I did not respond the moment I saw your email. Life is quite challenging each moment on some levels today, living conditions need improvement, health conditions are annoying, loneliness is peaking above the hope and trying to drown me, and a few other challenges present, well, challenges, but...

I am so happy you wrote, so happy to respond, even if my usual euphoria is somewhat dampened by current life circumstances. As long as I remember that everything is momentary, even life is temporary, I know there is so much more in the bigger picture of life, the universe, and everything, than the challenges I face today (and the temporary wallowing in self-pity will pass as it always does as I laugh at the futility of creating such unnecessary drama... maybe I should consider screenwriting as unnecessary drama is what apparently sells lol lam).

Please know that apologies are appreciated for their intent and I do treasure intentions (a film once gave me this quote and it remains meaningful to me --- "There are no perfect people, only perfect intentions" -- and I admire and respect and love perfect intentions. It is challenging to be one so blessed (or is that cursed? lol... I know I am one) and apologies seem to come routinely when kindness and sensitivity are present and I sense they are with you. Still, once I accept someone means no harm and their intentions are to be kind and respectful, apologies are not needed. You need no apologies with me. :)

The kind words are praiseworthy and I thank you for the warm feeling you inspire. Ego loves you lol (and as I may have said before, laughing at my ego keeps him in check, which is good because too much ego spoils everything :)

I appreciate your words whenever you send them. I do understand life can be very busy, especially with studies and what I know of engineering, it requires much concentration. Don't forget that your love of music and arts is important too. I hope you find time for your drawing too. If you share anything online (deviantart is one site that comes to mind), I'd love to see what you draw.

So life here has been busy and challenging, but the busy part still includes much fun. It is rainy season here in central Florida, so my last seven scheduled softball games have been cancelled due to rain, I have a softball tournament in Nashville, Tennessee next weekend and I am hoping the rain is not so heavy up there. The team I travel with is pretty good and much fun. We won a tournament in Dallas, Texas, a couple of months ago. My Monday night team has a 6-1 record and with three games to go we have a good chance of winning in that league. Once the rain lets us play again lol.

While the rain gets in the way of some activities, I love the storms. Thunder, lightening, the pouring sheets of rain, that is one reason I love the semi-tropical climate here. There's still plenty of sun and heat almost every day as most days the storms last just an hour or two. Enough to soak the fields, but also to enrich the Earth and keep the area very green and as healthy as it can be with humans on the planet. Mother nature is putting on a wonderful show outside right now. Flash, boom, and the constant splash and sounds of running water call me to sit on the porch and just experience life.

My work is still very much fun and rewarding for me. I continue to learn more and do more for the employees and in turn, the people of Seminole County and more people show appreciation as they get to know me. I listen to music and watch TV most evenings when I am not out, which is about half the time. TV is more distraction or escape than anything else, though I do allow myself to become part of some long running stories and experience, through empathy and imagination, a sense of family with some characters. Much like readong, the words become real in the mid, for at lest the duration of the story. Sometimes I was TV to learn and lately, Hamilton's Pharmacopeia has caught some of my attention. Often TV is on in the background while I am writing. Still, music is much more my home.

Some old songs from the 60s through 80s, Elton John, Billy Joel, the Moody Blues mixed with some Beatles and some Melissa Etheridge have kept me company lately. Others mixing in include Placebo, Jackson Brown, Pink Floyd, and Harry Chapin. Harry is one of my favorite songwriters and people and though his body is gone from this life, his words and music and inspiring acts of kindness live on in my mind and through my life. Words and music, songs, are a form of spiritual or ethereal communication for me and the more honest expressions of life are put into songs, the more I like them.

There's a bit of catching up for you. I hope you find yourself smiling and not too bored :)

Write whenever there's time and you feel like sharing. tell me whatever you feel like telling me. I love knowing friends, whether through words from a distance or close up in time and space, but don't feel obligated to share anything you are not comfortable sharing. What I've learned through years of correspondence is that words (and arts, images, drawings, and anything that can be sent through the posts or mails) can reach deep into people and bring them as close as any sharing and in some ways, even closer. I also know that sharing occasionally can be fun and rewarding and meaningful as well. So share as you please. :)

Time to watch and listen to the storm now and let it remind me of renewal and regrowth and the cycle of life where hope and joy always comes around if we are patient and aware.

hl,
ric